[lfjokes] quotes about women (from women)

[Adam Shand]

this is a little on the inspirational side o fthings to really be send out
to lfjokes but  hell, we can be "worthwhile" everyonce in a while.  hah.

From: rebecca <rebecca at wetafx.co.nz>

The hardest years in life are those between ten and seventy.
- Helen Hayes (at 73)

I refuse to think of them as chin hairs. I think of them as stray
eyebrows.
- Janette Barber

Who ever thought up the word "Mammogram"? Every time I hear it, I think
I'm supposed to put my breast in an envelope and send it to someone.
- Jan King

A few weeks after my surgery, I went out to play catch with my golden
retriever. When I bent over to pick up the ball, my prosthesis fell out.
The dog snatched it, and I found myself chasing him down the road yelling
"Hey, come back here with my breast!"
- Linda Ellerbee

Things are going to get a lot worse before they get worse.
- Lily Tomlin

You know the hardest thing about having cerebral palsy and being a woman?
It's plucking your eyebrows. That's how I originally got pierced ears.
- Geri Jewell

A male gynecologist is like an auto mechanic who never owned a car.
- Carrie Snow

Laugh and the world laughs with you. Cry and you cry with your
girlfriends.
- Laurie Kuslansky

My second favorite household chore is ironing. My first being hitting my
head on the top bunk bed until I faint.
- Erma Bombeck

Old age ain't no place for sissies.
- Bette Davis

A man's got to do what a man's got to do. A woman must do what he can't.
- Rhonda Hansome

The phrase "working mother" is redundant.
- Jane Sellman

Every time I close the door on reality it comes in through the windows.
- Jennifer Unlimited

Thirty-five is when you finally get your head together and your body
starts falling apart.
- Caryn Leschen

I try to take one day at a time, but sometimes several days attack me at
once.
- Jennifer Unlimited

If you can't be a good example, then you'll just have to be a horrible
warning.
- Catherine Aird

When I was young, I was put in a school for retarded kids for two years
before they realized I actually had a hearing loss...and they called ME
slow!
- Kathy Buckley

Behind every successful woman, is a substantial amount of coffee.
- Stephanie Piro