[lfjokes] NIN Humour

[Adam Shand]

From: Shannon Murray <shannon at earthlight.co.nz>
Via: news://alt.music.nin

Then I think I can help you. I don't like his music, but some of you
apparently do. I've written new lyrics for some of Trent's songs, with a
religious bent, so you can sing along without blaspheming. I got this idea
while praying. I immediately rushed over to my computer and typed these
up. Email me any comments you have or possible improvements, or post them
here. Especially tell me if I left any negative lyrics in. I don't want
anyone to think Christians believe in such bad things. I based these on
lyrics obtained from nineinchnails.net. Here we go...

Song: Mr. Self Respect

i am the love inside your head
i am the voice when you do bad
i am the strength that I provide
i am the joy you cannot hide
i take you where you want to go
i help you out I fix you up
i make you too strong to give up
mr. self respect
i speak religion's message clear
i am denial guilt and fear
i am those who still believe
i am the truth that you do heed
i take you where you want to go
i give you all you need to know
i help you out I fix you up
mr. self respect
i take away all of your pain
I give you glory, joy and fame
i know that you're free from blame
i am the love in you for more
all I ask is that you believe
i am the truth from which they run
Faith is the only thing you need
For all you sins I still must bleed
i take you where you want to go
i give you all you need to know
i help you out I fix you up
mr. self respect
i take you where you want to go
i give you all you need to know
i help you out I fix you up
mr. self respect

Song: Heresy

he sewed his eyes shut because he is afraid to see
he tries to tell me what God put inside of me
he got the answers to ease my curiosity
he serves the dark one and says he's an agnostic
God isn't dead and He still cares
When you go to hell you'll meet him there
You deny scripture, and think you're enlightening
You spread your virus, made up of a ball of lies
Your perfect kingdom of killing, suffering, and pain
demands devotion, blaspheming His holy name
God isn't dead and He still cares
When you go to hell you'll meet him there
God isn't dead and He still cares
When you go to hell you'll meet him there
God isn't dead and He still cares
When you go to hell you'll meet him there

Song: Big man with no gun

i am a big man
(yes i am)
but i dont have a gun
got me the holy book and I
I'm going to heaven
Fighting Satan
well, it's what God wants
maybe I'll spread God's word
you know, cause I have a calling
i have the Lord on my side
i have the power
My faith is hard as steel
Noone can stop me
i'll give my life for God
and so will you somehow
me and my holy book
nothing can stop me now
ha le luh i a!
God's grace flows over you
ha le luh i a!
God's grace flows over you
ha le luh i a!
God's grace flows over you
ha le luh i a!
God's grace flows over you
me and my holy book
me and my holy book
me and my holy book
me and my holy book
                        my holy book
me and my holy book
                        my holy book
me and my holy book
                        my holy book
me and my holy book
                        my holy book
me and my holy book

I'll write more as soon as I do it... I'm really busy volunteering for
church work and spreading God's word on usenet and stuff like that.

Yours in Christ,
Michael Winters

Troll.

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