[lfjokes] Being Australian...

[Simondo]

From: simondo <simondo at paradise.net.nz>

A Chinese man decides to move to Australia after 50 years of living in
Shanghai. He buys a small piece of land in the country. A few days after
moving in, the friendly Aussie neighbour decides to go across and welcome
the new guy to the region.  

So he goes next door, but on his way up the drive-way, he sees the 
Chinese man running around his front yard chasing about 10 hens. 
Not wanting to interrupt this "Chinese customs", he decides
to put the welcome on hold for the day. 

The next day, he decides to try again, but just as he is about to knock 
on the front door, he looks through the window and sees the Chinese 
man urinate into a glass and then drink it. Not wanting to interrupt 
another "Chinese custom", he decides to put the welcome on hold for 
yet another day. 

A day later he decides to give it one last go, but on his way next door, 
he sees the Chinese man leading a cow down the drive-way, pause, 
and then put his head next to the cow's bum. The Aussie bloke can't 
handle this, so he goes up to the Chinese man and says, 
"What the hell is it with your Chinese customs? I come over to welcome 
you to the neighbourhood, and see you running around the yard after hens. 
The next day you are pissing in a glass, and drinking it, and then today, 
you have your head so close to that cow's bum, it could just about shit on 
you."

The Chinese man is very taken back and says, "Sorry Sir, you do not
understand, these aren't Chinese customs I am performing, but 
Australian customs."  
"What do you mean mate", says the Aussie, "Those aren't
Australian customs."  
"Yes they are", replied the Chinese man, "for you see, in order for me to 
become a true Australian, I must Chase Chicks, Drink Piss, and listen to 
Bull-shit."