[lfjokes] Not plain sailing after joke advert

[Simondo]

From: http://www.stuff.co.nz/inl/index/0,1008,1188913a3840,FF.html

Also in the Otago Daily Times 4/5/2002

 Not plain sailing after joke advert
 04 MAY 2002
 By SEAN FLAHERTY
 Wife-swapping is never usually this public.
 Nor are husbands generally known to place an advertisement seeking to 
trade
 their wife for a boat.
 
 Andrew Gilmour holds his hands up: "It was a joke."
 
 It was also last weekend and yesterday he could still barely talk for
 laughing.
 
 His wife, Shirley, laughed too. She also hit him a lot and swore her reply
 would be as satisfying as it was brutal.
 
 "I'll be sleeping with one eye open," Mr Gilmour said.
 
 The Dunedin couple's story started on April Fool's Day when Mr Gilmour (35)
 rang his wife from Christchurch airport to be told his new motorcycle had
 been stolen.
 
 "I threw a tantrum. There was smoke coming out my nostrils," he said.
 
 Finding out it was a joke only made him angrier
 
 He swore revenge and it came in the form of a classified newspaper
 advertisement featuring a photograph of his wife with their home phone
 number and the words: "English import, 1 Kiwi owner, high miles, bodywork a
 bit rough, very thirsty, extremely noisy, will trade for boat and engine."
 
 Mr Gilmour, a recreational boat user who does actually want a new boat,
 nevertheless arranged to be away for the weekend. The phone started ringing
 red-hot.
 
 "They were saying, `Yeah, gidday, I hear you've got a wife for sale'," Mrs
 Gilmour said.
 
 The 35-year-old singer quickly worked out what had happened and was 
fuming.
 
 The offers varied in quality - the best, from a Wyndham farmer, was "a 19ft
 Cresta craft, with a V6 on the back."
 
 So what would it have taken for Mr Gilmour to swap his wife?
 
 He gets out of hitting range.
 
 "I would have accepted a decent cabin cruiser with a good motor. And if
 they'd thrown a bit of cash in, that would have been a bonus."