[lfjokes] Penis van Lesbian...

[Simondo]

This good looking man walks into an agents office in Hollywood and says 
"I want to be a movie-star." Tall, handsome and with experience on 
Broadway.... he had all the right credentials. The agent asked, "What's 
your name?" The guy said, "my name is Penis Van Lesbian." The agent said, 
"Sir, I hate to tell you, but in order to get into Hollywood, you are 
gonna have to change your name." "I will NOT change my name! The Van 
Lesbian name is centuries old, I will not disrespect my grandfather by 
changing my name. Not ever!" The agent said, "Sir, I have worked in 
Hollywood for years..... you will NEVER go far in Hollywood with a name 
like Penis Van Lesbian!! I'm telling you, you will HAVE TO change your 
name, or I will not be able to represent you." "So be it!! I guess, we 
will not do business together" the guy said....and he left the agent's 
office.  

FIVE YEARS LATER..... The agent opens an envelope sent to his office. 
Inside the envelope is a letter and a check for $50,000. The agent is 
awestruck....who would possibly send him $50,000? He reads the letter 
enclosed... "Dear Sir, Five years ago, I came into your office wanting to 
become an actor in Hollywood. You told me I needed to change my name. 
Determined to make it with my God-given birth name, I refused. You told 
me I would never make it in Hollywood with a name like 'Penis Van 
Lesbian.' After I left your office, I thought about what you said and I 
decided you were right. I had to change my name. I had too much pride to 
return to your office, so I signed with another agent. I would never have 
made it without changing my name, so the enclosed check is a token of my 
appreciation. Thank you for your advice. Sincerely, "Dick Van Dyke"